It’s Coming Apart As I Watch – Help Save My Marriage!
Help save my marriage! This is a cry that you’ll hear from many people, particularly women. They say that marriages are made in heaven, but today, it seems that they are made here on earth and many end right here too. It is a painful thing to watch your marriage fall apart. This is the person that you chose to live your whole life with. You signed a legal contract to remain committed to each other, but its dissolving.
Can you help stop a divorce? It’s a desperate question, but many marriages can be saved if the 2 people in it can talk about things, be open with each other, seek help and try to change. It’s hard to change when we are so fixed in our ways, but sometimes that’s the only way we are going to fix things.
The first and most important thing you need to do is to seek outside help – the help of someone who has nothing but professional interests vested in your marriage. Today, there are many therapists who have set themselves up specifically to help with marriage problems, and seeing one, initially separately and then together should help you both begin to understand where you went wrong. When you seek professional help, it would be a waste of your money if you were not totally honest with the therapist so that they can understand the situation as clearly as possible and give you the best help that they can.
Healing is hard – don’t take it lightly. Whatever caused the rift between the two of you can happen again, and you must identify it and promise that you’ll not let it repeat. Watch out for triggers that can spiral into distrust, because at such a time, they can cause you to lose all the ground you’ve gained.
But what if your partner does not understand, doesn’t want to see a therapist and won’t co-operate to try and save your marriage? It’s not unheard of. It will hurt to even consider it, but a person like that is probably best out of your life so that you can make room for a new love. If they are not interested in saving what you had, let them go; hanging on to them will hurt more than help you. You will have done your best to save the marriage, but remember that it takes the two of you for it to work.
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