Is Your Spouse Cheating? » Cheating Husband

Cheating Men Will Always Give You the Signs to Look For…

Mo — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 10:22:14 +0000

…You Just Need to Know What to Look For!

It can be very painful to find out that your man is cheating. For some women, it will happen maybe once or twice in their lives, but others find themselves in relationships time and time again with cheating men.

There is a school of thought that some women are serially cheated on because they look for particular qualities that are usually found in unfaithful men, but whether this is true or not, you can save yourself a lot of heartache and grief if you learn to tell from the onset that a man is cheating on you.

The only way to do this is familiarize yourself with the behaviour of a man who is seeing other women, and here are some things that you can look for:

1) A man who is cheating will be suspicious of you! And he’ll talk a lot about cheating. Why? Because since he’s doing it, he thinks that you may be doing it too. It’s true that we talk most about the things that we do, so if he is suddenly thinking that you may be cheating, you need to check what he is up to.

2) His guilt will usually manifest in criticisms of you that he never had before. Your housekeeping will suddenly be no good, your sex is not satisfactory and many other little things. His conscience is taking little bites at him, and he is releasing his pain by taking little bites at you.

3) There are changes in habit that will have your feelers up. If he always showers before bed and is now very keen to shower as soon as he gets home from work, there could be a good reason.

If he spends time with you in the kitchen as you cook but he is suddenly hiding behind his newspaper all the time, you should check if he has something to hide.

4) Family occasions are usually important, but if your man is suddenly too preoccupied with work to attend them, maybe he is not actually working. If he misses the annual family get-together or his child’s birthday, that’s a sign that there could be something else that he is up to.

5) Lastly, nothing beats your gut feel. You know your man well enough. If you feel in your gut that he is seeing someone else because of some things you have observed, you should follow your instinct and check to be sure.

Notice that there are a lot of “maybes” and “coulds”. That’s because there is no standard way to know a man is cheating unless he is blatant about it. Because of this, always approach with caution, and make sure that you can back up your suspicions.

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Tiger Woods – Cheating Spouse

Mo — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 11:26:38 +0000

Well with daily revelations about Tiger Woods’ activity as the mega cheating spouse, you have to wonder what his wife Elin will now do!

Apparently it is the sheer amount of cheating that has left the woman reeling, not to mention the fact that the cheating with some of these women went on for YEARS!!

Of course, we know on this site and from the emails that we get here, that Tiger Woods is not alone in his rampant cheating ways! Spouses all over the country are regularly caught with their pants down in the wrong hotel room, with the wrong person!

Would you stay or would you go? Tiger Woods’ Wife Elin.

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Should You Tell Your Family and Friends He Cheated?

Admin — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 09:42:41 +0000

When you catch your spouse cheating, it’s devastating and you naturally might not immediately know how to deal with the situation. So you’re presented with two directions to take, you’re either going to want to keep what you’re going through to yourself, or you’re going to want to confide in family and friends as a means of support.

But should you immediately opt for the latter or should you keep things to yourself initially?

Well the stark answer to that is – it depends!

There are real times and occasions when you should seriously consider what use telling your nearest and dearest would be. This is because you’re always going to get those friends or family members who will demonize your spouse and expect you to dump him and move on and if you don’t, then you could find yourself with not only a cheating husband on your hands, but also a disapproving friend or family member.

So before you hit the phone sobbing your heart and telling your mum, your sister or your best friend that he’s cheating on you, think long and hard on it.

Truth be told there will come a time when it will be easier for you to openly share what you’ve been through or what you’re going through, but that time might be later on.

Consider thinking things through first. Decide what YOU want to do before you start getting advice from those around you and once you have things straight in your mind, then confide in them and you tell them what you did or what you’re going to do!

Remember, the decision is yours!

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Cheating Husband – Who You Gonna Blame?

Mo — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 05:15:53 +0000

So you’ve discovered your husband is cheating on you?

When the pain, humiliation and anger hits you and you’re looking around for someplace to dump your rage, who’re you gonna blame? Where are you going to dump it? On your cheating husband or on the other woman?

Tough to believe, but studies show that 4 out 6 women will first and foremost blame the other woman! Mixed in there will be some blame for the husband, but mostly the brown stuff will initially get slung at the other woman.

There’s an argument to be made by some that the blame should be placed squarely at the husband’s feet. And I have to say that I’ve heard no convincing argument why that shouldn’t be the case! After all, the other woman didn’t sign up and agree to “love no other but you!” Your husband did!

Truth is, the other woman might not even know that the man she’s been having a relationship with is even married. Some guys are really adept at lying and hiding. Of course for those women who do know that they’re involved with a married man, they need to wake up and realize that what they’re doing will bring nothing but pain and hurt, they need to walk away!

It’s an easy out to blame your husband’s lover, but at the end of the day YOUR husband has strayed and betrayed YOU and no matter how painful that is, that is something that YOU have to accept.

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My Husband Cheated With My Bestfriend – Part 2

Mo — Mon, 30 Mar 2009 10:26:50 +0000

… My Husband Cheated with My Bestfriend – Part 1

Chrissy’s first gut instinct was that she pretty much didn’t want the marriage to end. Even as she was dealing with the initial shock of her discovery, she knew she didn’t want the marriage over. She had three boys, time invested in her marriage, all their assets were in both their names and the biggest shock of all that she reported, was that she still loved Allen. Yes she was angry and mortified and wounded, but she still loved him.

She had always told herself that if Allen ever cheated on her, she’d walk out and not look back! That all changed though when the reality of her situation hit her.

What we advised Cheryl to do was to take a deep breath and sit down with Allen and talk and listen.

It took them days to come to the point where they could sit down together, but they knew they had to. What Chrissy found out was that her marriage had been going downhill around the birth of their second son – four years! Allen had felt more and more pushed out with the birth of their children and had he’d never felt he could bring it up to Chrissy.

Chrissy didn’t really know where to go and what to do. Worse of all, she no longer had her ‘bestfriend’ who she had decided never to see again, to talk to about it. So she contacted us.

Our advice was for the two of them to face up to where they were in their relationship and to come clean to each other. What had gone wrong in their relationship? How they specifically wanted to go forward/what would their ideal relationship look like?

Chrissy explained that she wanted to work, she wanted her own life but she still wanted to be a wife and mother. They carved out what we call “Sacred Time” which basically means time for the two of them to spend together without the children, doing something that they both enjoy. “Sacred Time” is time that is set in concrete and can only be changed for real emergencies.

What they also had to deal with was the deep betrayal that Chrissy felt and the shame that Allen felt. Allen admitted that he hadn’t fully grasped the level of deceit that his actions had brought him to. He fully accepted that he was to blame for his adultery but he also felt that the demise of the marriage was something they had both contributed. Which might seem disingenuous, but in that he’s right.

Chrissy’s thoughts are that it would:

Take her a helluva long time to trust him again!

Time! Recovering from adultery and the ripples and shock waves that adultery and cheating causes in a marriage/relationship takes time and work.

Chrissy and Allen have a long way to go, but they both have a clear and specific place that they want to get to and they want to get there together!

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My Husband Cheated with My Bestfriend – Part 1

Admin — Sat, 21 Mar 2009 08:16:25 +0000

The Is Your Spouse Cheating Team was recently contacted by Chrissy (name changed for privacy) asking for help and advice about what to do.

As the title suggests, she found out that Allen, her husband of 7 years and father to her three boys, had been cheating on her with her best friend for eleven months. Naturally she was devastated and her world hit a wall faster than she could ever have imagined!

I just ran outside and bawled hysterically! And it was only when he came out after me and I saw him standing in front of me, trying to put his arms around me, trying to calm me down, that I realized it was actually pouring with rain and we were both soaked to the skin!

Chrissy had known something was wrong for months and had confronted her husband twice before. Asking him to talk to her and tell her what was wrong, what was different. But Allen always denied it, reassuring her everything was “cool” and he was happy. But deep down she just knew something was wrong!

Their sex life had virtually died!
They had stopped talking about what they wanted in a year, two years, five years from now!
There was a distance she felt she couldn’t get by. He’d often give her one word answers whenever she tried to make conversation!
And he was having the odd night out on his own or with ‘friends’! Nothing more than a couple of nights a month! But as it turned out, enough!

Allen had a pretty full on job as an IT executive and so Chrissy decided to stop picking at it and managed to convince herself it was all down to work, the stresses of bringing up a young family and the natural ebbs and flows of a marriage.

To anyone looking in Chrissy & Allen were living the ideal life: three beautiful boys, lovely home, two cars, great social life and holidays abroad!

So instead of bothering Allen with her worries, Chrissy took to confiding in her best friend, Jill. She and Jill had been there for each other throughout their lives since they met at High School together.

As Chrissy confided in her best friend, Jill would often say quite casually that “maybe Allen’s having an affair?”

Chrissy always said there was no way, he’d ever do that! They were having problems, but he’d never cheat on her.

The shock and betrayal of discovering that the two people she trusted most in the world had conspired to lie to her, to undermine her and to behave so recklessly and so selfishly with her life and her feelings, meant that once she discovered the betrayal, it made the coming months the most challenging of Chrissy’s life.

You’d think the worst part was walking in on them, but it wasn’t! The aftermath took gut work! Having to see them, speak to them, explain something to the boys – it had me on my knees! I literally couldn’t walk!

…more to come!

Monitor Cell Phone – but Watch Out For the Sly

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Signs of a Cheating Husband – Showering

Admin — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 12:38:10 +0000

One of the classic signs of a cheating husband has to be a change in his bathroom habits. Not to put too finer point on it, but if your husband has out of the blue taken to water then there is a chance that he might be having an affair.

Okay, so my first point of caution here is not to jump immediately to the conclusion that your husband is cheating on you, just because he is showering more frequently than before. All you need at this stage is to add this to a list of other signs that you might be seeing in his behavior.

It is a well known fact that when a man has a new lover in his life he will start to keep himself looking good and smelling fresh, so that means that where before he was quite happy to go around with the occasional shower, he has now taken to showering once, twice or three times a day.

What can sometimes be another give away is that when he comes home from being out, he will head straight to the shower to wash off the smell of the other woman. If your husband won’t even let you have a welcome home kiss, never mind a hug, then it could be because he doesn’t want you smelling the other woman on him or seeing any signs of her on him.

If you have other signs of a cheating husband that you’re worried about, check out his showering habits and see if you can build up a picture of just what he might be up to.

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The Four Common Signs Of A Cheating Spouse

Admin — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 10:51:30 +0000

If you suspect your spouse of cheating then you’re no doubt looking around for some of the common signs of cheating and seeing if you can see this behavior in your spouse.

Doesn’t really matter what has happened in the past, what had lead up to your spouse’s possibly bad behavior, now you want to know how to spot the signs.

Well I’ve got to say that whether you come right out and ask your spouse “what’s going on?” or you dig around trying to find the answer yourself, I’m not sure that it makes much difference.

Here’s What You Look For

Has your spouse started to keep really weird and odd hours? They have times during the day or night that they just can’t or won’t account for.
Has your spouse taken to secretive cell phone or internet behavior: deleting their history online or password protecting their accounts where before you knew any necessary passwords?
Are they showering or bathing at times that they never did before because they know they smell of the other person’s scent?
Has your love life grown cold because your spouse is getting it someplace else and doesn’t have the time, energy or inclination for a physical relationship with you?

If you can tick any or all of the above, then perhaps your spouse is cheating on you?

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“How Can I Tell If My Husband Is Cheating?”

Admin — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 10:52:08 +0000

A friend asked me the other day, “How can I tell if my husband is cheating?” and the question surprised me. I thought of all the people to ask me that I never would’ve thought she was. I looked at their marriage as 100% rock solid and secure! But then, no marriage is immune from cheating if things start going wrong and they are left to go wrong.

So, I gave her a check list of signs to see if she really thought her husband was cheating.

How’s your sex life? Has it become less or non existent?
Is he keeping different hours that make no sense to you?
Is he fixated on his cell/mobile and taking secret calls at weird times?
Has he bought new clothes, underwear?
Does he have times of the day that he can’t account for and for which he will not or cannot give you an explanation.

I had some more pointers to give to her, but by the time I had got to number 5 on my list I didn’t need to go any further. The shock realization on her face was all that I needed to know that she was now sure that her husband was cheating on her.

Here’s the thing, asking the question “How can I tell if my husband is cheating?” is one thing, being prepared for any answer that comes your way is another thing.

So make sure that when you go looking for an answer that you’re prepared for what that answer might be.

The last thing I said to my friend was to be 100% sure and have actual proof BEFORE she went and confronted her husband. I suggested she use Reverse Phone Detective to get the proof on a cell number she was suspicious about, but only if she was again sure proof is what she wanted.

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